GOF’s Olde English nursery rhymes

This is for my new friend, 6 year-old Tristan Bjelke-Whitlam who attends the Toorak Special School for the socially disadvantaged.  
Tristan recently wrote the following letter to me.

Dear Tristan,

Thank you for your letter.  I wrote these little nursery rhymes especially for you. See if you can guess the missing words. (I have written the answer below each one just in case you put a wrong word in the space provided.)  Oh and don’t worry too much about what your Mum says. She just has trouble repressing her primal urges whenever she sees a picture of me here in The Bucket.

Best wishes from Uncle GOF.

Hey Diddle Diddle

Hey diddle diddle
The cat and the fiddle.
The cow jumped over the moon.
The little dog laughed
Till exploding cow bowels
Came down like a _ _ _ _-filled balloon.

(MUCK)

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Little Miss Muffet
(Australian spelling version)

Little Miss Muffet
Sat on a tuffet,
Eating her curds and whey.
Then down came a spider,
Who sat down beside her,
And saw her fat _ _ _ _ on display.

(ARMS)

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Mary Mary Quite Contrary

Mary, Mary, quite contrary.
How does your garden grow?
“On the corpses of curious people I kill.”
“So who the _ _ _ _ wants to know?”

(HECK)

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Explanatory Note for my overseas friends;
As a partial explanation for Tristan’s confused state of mind and evidence of my own beyond-repair one, Joh Bjelke-Petersen was a vindictive Christian right-wing dictator who once ruled Queensland, and Gough Whitlam from the opposite side of politics, who, despite his own shortcomings, was the last truly statesman-like Prime Minister of Australia.
Toorak is a suburb in Melbourne where the well-heeled live in mansionly magnificence.

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