1. For today’s gourmet extravaganza let us begin by using a heaped prattle of pre-packaged Evangelism.
Our bible reading in Melanesian Tok Pisin is from the
Gospel according to Matthew Chapter 24 verse 31.
In the unlikely event that you lack fluency in this language, it is all about angels, bugles and people being collected from all compass points and swept off to some better place. A little New Guinea Rapture.
Na bai em i salim ol ensel bilong en, na biugel bai i krai bikpela, na oli bungim ol manmeri em i bin makim bilong em. Bai ol i kisim ol long hap bilong olgeta 4-pela win, i go olgeta long arere tru bilong graun.
Please don’t thank me with any great profusion. I am merely a humble vessel dripping vague hope, ambiguity and confusion for the benefit of humankind wherever I go.
2 Now add a dash of inspiration from the antiquity cupboard.
The most requested ingredient during the last month has been some raw Viggo…….. The Bucket Culinary Department worked overtime to manufacture this product in response to your insatiable demands, so please dissect and share him amongst yourselves.
(Personally I don’t see what all the fuss is about.)
4. Add two square eyeballs of disillusionment.
Freeview is Australia’s new television extravaganza.
Sixteen free-to-air television channels instead of the previous five.
It is being relentlessly promoted by a gaggle of pre-geriatric small-screen has-beens wearing permanently beaming faces which are probably the result of cosmetic surgery gone wrong.
Either that, or the commercials were shot in a studio where the atmosphere was predominantly nitrous oxide.
So recently, in the absence of Mrs GOF’s normal midday commentary on the world, I decided to snoop around this apparently wonderful thing that my country has done for itself.
Each one of the 7 channels I selected had either news stories, movies or crime shows depicting people who had suffered from acts of violence perpetrated against them, or who had been, or were about to be, killed in various creative ways.
I switched the television off.
I might turn it back on one day if someone can convince me that my life will be enhanced and uplifted by doing so.
5. Garnish with two sprigs of my Peculiar Perspective.
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Bon appetit……and Ringo turns 71 today. Happy birthday Ringo.