The 60 kilometre drive from Cairns towards the equator is one of Australia's most scenic coastal journeys. The coastal mountain range rises to 3000 feet on the left with the Coral Sea and Great Barrier Reef out to the right.
Destination Mossman is a little sugar cane town surrounded by lush rainforest, waterfalls, mist and cloud.
A location direct from the imagination movie set of my childhood.
Along the way there is;
Situated on a narrow isthmus, this incongruous tourist development is famous for attracting millionaires, American Presidents, and scoundrel entrepreneurs who feasted on the 1980's financial boom, and subsequently fled to Spain to avoid extradition to confront their fiscal sins.
Port Douglas has only one redeeming feature.
It is the home of genuine Aussie Mocka's pies.
Beyond that, I have my own little surprise for Port Douglas.
I am going to sever the peninsula just seaward of Mocka's boundary, then push the whole catastrophic hideousness, complete with it's flashing navigation beacon, out into the Pacific Ocean where it will navigate it's way on the prevailing westerlies through the Panama canal and attach itself to Miami where it will be with friends.
I have a gut feeling the Pope is going to endow me with Australia's second sainthood for this.