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Life is a masquerade

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A sad fact of life is that we often have great difficulty in fully understanding those who are closest to us.
Broken relationships provide the raw material for at least one pontificating television psychologist to comfortably fill some bank accounts, as well as being an enormous financial burden upon Governments.

The illusion of the Prince or Princess Charming, once fully powdered, preened and perfumed during days of courtship, is shattered by the farting, burping, odiferous slovenly slob sharing your life after completion of the nuptials or hastily conceived cohabitation.              (Ed; Mrs GOF is a very tolerant woman)

I am addressing this subject partly because the 50-ish husband of a friend of Mr and Mrs GOF's, has, after 20 years of marriage and 2 children, decided that he is now a woman, and taken off permanently to Sydney with all the cash to have a sex change operation.

Our friend is utterly shattered.  She did not see it coming.

Sharon Stone once famously said; "Women might be able to fake orgasms, but men can fake whole relationships".

Sadly it is somewhat too late in life for me to conduct much practical research on her first assertion, but I would however like to take her to task for suggesting that the "fake relationships"  behaviour is gender specific.  
There is ample evidence available about men who have also unsuspectingly been led down the garden path by unscrupulous women.

Our world is filled with misrepresentation.

Politicians decorate themselves with an inordinate array of fictitious credibility, and empty promises of riches for us all, so they may achieve election to office.
Then revert to childish and loutish behaviour during parliamentary debate, and consume more than their fair share from our public purse for their own comfort and self aggrandisement.

Ordinary flawed men disguised and adorned with extravagant glittering robes, jewellery and accoutrements of office, preach divisive messages of religion with an arrogant certainty that they, and their marque alone, have God's total blessing.  

And how well do we ever really know our own selves, beyond the veneer, and the daily masquerade we perform for the world, changing personality costumes as we variously interact with children, bosses, partners and strangers.
Certainly in my own life I have done many things which I would, in my brief moments of sanity, have considered totally inexplicable and "out of character".

What talents and gifts remain embryonic and undiscovered within us during lifetimes preoccupied with trivia and the mundane?
How much evil, and destructive behaviour are we each really capable of if given sufficient intellectual, spiritual and physical malnourishment?
When we are ultimately tested will we display cowardice or bravery and heroism?

For most of us, we will never know the answers.

And for me, I think that might just be for the best.

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About GOF

"Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it, depends upon what you put into it." (Tom Lehrer)

17 responses »

  1. … as it is for everyone.I hear stories like that of your friend, and have a hard time really believing that the spouse had no clue at all. But then again, when the occasional story comes out along that line where the spouse has no problem with the new decision and decides to stay together as a couple … I have to pick my jaw up off of the ground.Your second paragraph reminds me of something I'm fond of saying (as a joke, of course) … "Women eat like birds. When you are dating – canaries; when you're married – vultures."

  2. What talents and gifts remain embryonic and undiscovered within us during lifetimes preoccupied with trivia and the mundane?I've also wondered about that, GOF. As Socrates says, "The unexamined life is not worth living". I don't think he was talking about sex change mid life crises though..

  3. Bravo. (And thanks, all, for the quotes.)

  4. This looks like Friday night material, GOF.I know it's "unblokey" to let the missus drive without argument but I have always excused it as being inherently lazy. I hope that doesn't mean I'll end up batting for the other team.I just don't get it. How can someone put up a front for so many years? Do they just wake up one day and discover an irresistible urge to start knitting or battle through hoping they will get over it?Come to think of it, I like counted cross stitch. I hope I don't start selecting clothes from the other side of the wardrobe.

  5. Thanks for the quotation GOM….I probably won't try it out on Mrs GOF or Globet ;-)I also agree that there must have been signs somewhere along the way.He thought he was going to "get away with it" and co-habitate with her whilst having his boyfriends on the side. Wonder why that didn't work!!

  6. So much stuff to examine in life Snowy, and so little time to do it in.

  7. I don't have too much difficulty in accepting that sexual preference might change during a person's lifetime.In this case what I find most objectionable is that he chose to leave his wife with no means of support. I am sufficiently old fashioned to believe that a man should make provision to care for the woman who has spent 20 years raising his children at home, whilst sacrificing any possibility of a working career.I'll still talk to you if you decide to start wearing dresses Peter.

  8. A good point.Re-entering the workforce is difficult enough even when you plan to by keeping your skills up. Arriving there unexpectedly is a shocker and add to that not having companionship to go home to at the end of the day.For the moment I'll stick to the lycra cycling gear.

  9. farting, burping, odiferous slovenly slob – didn't know you knew MrFD!

    I am of the opinion that we are all capable of great good and great bad, all we need are the circumstances to bring it forth from us. The Hero can also be the Savage. One look at the news gives evidence how fast insane mob rule can break down a society.
    Over the years I have known two men who have married and fathered children only to decide that they were gay and in this instance I think it is fear to admit our inner feelings, or to own our own feelings that lead to great hurt for those around them. Honesty is a great value to me, and the first person we have to be honest with is ourselves. Of course that often comes at great cost most times. However we are only here on this planet for a short time, and whether is is something after that is open to conjecture, so we may as well make the mostt of what we have here and now.

  10. Thank you for your thoughtful comment FD. I share your sentiments about honesty.Perhaps we now fortunately have a society which makes openly being honest with our selves and others a little easier to practise than it was last century.

  11. For the moment I'll stick to the lycra cycling gear.Probably a wise move. Much better than a dress for cycling;-)

  12. And still legal though the new conservatism may see us cyclists wearing the cycling equivalent of dresses for piano legs.

  13. I think this is "sad" on so many levels. Sometimes society makes it incredibly difficult for people to be honest with even themselves. LOL – I did like Grouchy Old Man's "Women eat like birds. When you are dating – canaries; when you're married – vultures." I went out to dinner with a guy once who said "I'm so glad you eat; most women don't". I was actually quite embarrassed!

  14. 'I think this is "sad" on so many levels."For the wife who is left to cope for herself with limited worldly skills to do so, and for his children and now grandchildren who he has chosen to abandon. That should also be sad for him.

  15. Gah, so hard to know who to trust! Well said though, especially about politicians and people who think they are entitled to God's blessings!

  16. Thank you, Ellie


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