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GOF’s new contractual arrangements

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I have, for the past few weeks been in negotiation with the creator of The Bucket, concerning its future.
We reached the following conclusions;

1. He is a deeply troubled soul, with such an array of personality disorders that he probably should be committed forthwith to an Institution for the Terminally Bewildered.

2. The Israelis and Palestinians have been very naughty boys indeed during my absence, and failed to adopt my guaranteed peace initiative. (here)

3. All of my future literary contributions to The Bucket shall be limited to serious subject matter only, in deference to the troubled state of the world.
It is not an appropriate time for levity, trivia, or the inconsequential.

So,

Whats with all the grunting, girls?

GOF has always enjoyed watching elite sportsmen and women on television.   The four Grand Slam tennis events of the world are on my viewing list.  Well they were.  I am now discouraged.  Poor GOF.
Womens tennis used to be a favorite of mine, partly because I enjoy watching beautiful women in short skirts (for which I may, in 2020, seek counselling), but mostly because they play extended rallies where they are able to exhibit a broader range of skills than the men who just blast off a series of aces at 200+ kilometres per hour.

So why has it become necessary in the last 10 years for some women players, especially from the ex Soviet bloc countries, to accompany every single stroke with ear shattering squeals, sneezes, grunts or facsimiles of orgasmic satisfaction?
Champions of eras past, Hingis, Graf, Navratilova, King, Court, and Goolagong conducted themselves with efficient and dignified silence.  
Women golfers, soccer players, baseball and basketball players don't do it.  Why has it seemingly becoming a prerequisite for highly ranked female tennis players?

Any possibility it has something to do with bad sportsman(women)ship and distracting the opposing player?

No, of course not.  Silly me. There's probably a perfectly plausible sporting biometric explanation.   One which has no concern for the principle that to honorably play the game is more important than to dishonorably win it.
 
And thank you to whoever invented the television "mute" button.

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About GOF

"Life is like a sewer. What you get out of it, depends upon what you put into it." (Tom Lehrer)

2 responses »

  1. Actually, I think in troubled times we need more levity, trivia, and inconsequential items … as long as they don't totally distract us from serious issues.I blame Monica Seles for the grunting … she's the first one I noticed doing it. She claimed she didn't do it on purpose, and didn't realize she was doing it until seeing a tape of herself playing. Yeah, right …You do bring up a good point. Why no loud grunting when hitting a golf ball with all your might?Not being a huge fan of tennis or golf, I will now be cursing you as I feel compelled to watch these events to check. LOL

    Reply
  2. Yeah, I'd forgotten about Monica Seles, but they have taken the sound effects to a much higher and diverse performance level these days.I am happy to have given you an excuse to watch more womens tennis.

    Reply

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